The Herb Woman

by Tyler Reed,
actor, writer, and builder

     "What was that?" I said looking back through the tall peach trees that were stretched across the old woman's yard.
     "Ed, could you slow down? I want to see were this herb garden is that I've wanted to go to for years." Said my grandmother, Nonnie.
     "Alright Wynell," said my grandfather Papa, "leave me alone."
     "Here it is, stop, turn around."
     "Alright, where is it."
     "Right here."
     While Papa tried to pull the car up through the narrow, overgrown, dirt road, Nonnie tried desperately to open the door. "Wait Wynell," Papa said jokingly, "there might be a German shepherd." Right then, around came a pretty, yet fat dog.
     "Ah," I said, "here it is."
     We were returning from another visit to Chincoteague with Nonnie, Papa, my cousin Whitney, and me (Tyler). The dog's barks were so loud it brought an old, big woman to the door. She stared at us for a while until Papa said, "We would like some herbs please." "Plenty of herbs," she said, "yes, yes, plenty of herbs." We soon parked in her driveway and got out and started to look around.
     There were many gardens and about eight peach trees that lined themselves in two rows of four. A third of the place was overgrown with tall shrubs. Very little sunlight could make it through the trees. The house needed a little work on the roof and siding. There were about four or five sheds that were placed in random order in the yard. The largest shed was attached to a chicken wire fence. In it there were six geese that walked all close together as if they were cold or protecting themselves from something.
     "What herbs do you want?" said the old woman, "I have plenty of herbs. Some of them are here, in this little garden or over there in that field. If you want some bigger herbs you can follow me around the house to were the shade is. You know how it is, you can't get enough shade for the plants. This is where most of my herbs are. If you want to buy some seeds to plant, I'll have to run inside and go through all my homemade stuff. I make things from my herbs, like soap and cleaners. I got started on making cleaning materials after my friend found out she was allergic to a chemical they put in floor cleaner. I also have a edible toilet bowl cleaner you can have, do you want some, its only twelve dollars. If you don't want that I can get you some different scents of soap."
     "No thank you, I would just like some herbs. I would like oregano, parsley, and basil," Nonnie said, "That's all I want."
     "This garden is such a mess," the old woman said, "this reminds me of the man that used to live with me. I split my house down the middle awhile back, and rent the other half of my house out to other people. The last person I rented out to was a man who loved candy bars and soft drinks, this man left chocolate and drinks all over the floor, it drove me nuts, so I just had to get rid of him."
     "In what way did you get rid of him," I asked.
     "Let's just say," she said, "that I can still here him howling and crying wishing he could come back.
     "So he still lives around the parts," I asked.
     "Yea," she added, "I see him almost every time I go outside, people like him have to be punished." "Isn't that right?" she said towards the dog. The dog gave a soft squeal.
     After having a peach throwing war with Papa and Whitney, Papa and I followed the old woman around the house to the other herb gardens. "If you want," she added, "you can take a look inside that shed." Papa, acting as if he was a little girl on the candy aisle, flew open the door and found different scents that no one but the old lady knew of. All the products in this shed were homemade. This must have been here little business. I found different kinds of cleaners, soaps, herbs, candles, mixtures, and spices, I even found the edible toilet bowl cleaner. I soon realized that Papa couldn't be found. I looked outside for him, in doing so I noticed that Whitney and Nonnie where missing as well.
     I saw the old woman appear from the shed that held the geese. "There you are," she said, "I've been looking all over for you."
     "Where are the others?" I asked.
     "They're around here somewhere."
     Just then two dogs came running towards me. One looked like a black poodle, with black, curly, fluffy hair, the other had much more straight hair. This dog looked more like a Labrador.
     "I thought you had only one dog"
     "Well, right now I have three dogs, although I've always wanted four." Right then a goose came around the shed following the two dogs. "What's that goose's name," I said. "I've decided to call him Edward," she said. Edward, I thought. Before I could speak my vision was blurred from color to black and white. I looked down to find that my hands and feet looked identical and my voice had turned into some sort of a bark. I turned to the two dogs and the goose and they began to look strangely familiar.
     

The End